Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
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