I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
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