i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Success! We fucked roommates!
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