cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
