Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
