Acid is not a monday night drug
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
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