I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
