she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
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