i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
