Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
