Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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