Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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