too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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