I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
