Texts From Last Night

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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.

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  (252): this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats. http://tfl.nu/6vwk
  Replies (64) Good night (5288) Bad night (1310)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."

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  (828): after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...." http://tfl.nu/7e08
  Replies (16) Good night (3188) Bad night (856)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.

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  (607): Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night. http://tfl.nu/v41h
  Replies (6) Good night (2388) Bad night (765)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.

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  (508): I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver. http://tfl.nu/smcq
  Replies (1) Good night (1347) Bad night (501)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers

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  (732): He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers http://tfl.nu/7nw7
  Replies (7) Good night (780) Bad night (997)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day

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  (216): Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day http://tfl.nu/avmh
  Replies (1) Good night (517) Bad night (851)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  I told you he wasn't attractive.

  (1-440): View more from Ohio

  Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..

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  (440): I told you he wasn't attractive. (1-440): Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf.. http://tfl.nu/x2hn
  Replies (9) Good night (427) Bad night (975)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.

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  (952): WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms. http://tfl.nu/gsmc
  Replies (6) Good night (477) Bad night (937)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?

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  (570): You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award? http://tfl.nu/wwxx
  Replies (9) Good night (923) Bad night (631)
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  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent

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  (+64): I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent http://tfl.nu/sl7e
  Replies (2) Good night (865) Bad night (423)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.

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  (416): He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco. http://tfl.nu/xwo8
  Replies (4) Good night (660) Bad night (382)
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  (909): View more from California

  omg i wish you could see the front of my car.

  (909): View more from California

  There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.

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  (909): omg i wish you could see the front of my car. (909): There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood. http://tfl.nu/64tw
  Replies (7) Good night (1031) Bad night (338)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind

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  (651): I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind http://tfl.nu/rbfo
  Replies (2) Good night (497) Bad night (351)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac

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  (516): I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac http://tfl.nu/kqv2
  Replies (4) Good night (258) Bad night (480)
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  (646): View more from New York

  How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him

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  (646): How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him http://tfl.nu/cz2z
  Replies (1) Good night (506) Bad night (318)

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