Texts From Last Night

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  (858): View more from California

  I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth

  (1-858): View more from California

  Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?

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  (858): I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth (1-858): Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again? http://tfl.nu/8rfw
  Replies (10) Good night (683) Bad night (5165)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.

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  (815): His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper. http://tfl.nu/rdz6
  Replies (35) Good night (1899) Bad night (2740)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls

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  (203): Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls http://tfl.nu/wu3r
  Replies (62) Good night (3375) Bad night (1030)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.

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  (301): people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture. http://tfl.nu/g8h6
  Replies (30) Good night (5383) Bad night (1409)
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  (714): View more from California

  Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.

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  (714): Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor. http://tfl.nu/w05t
  Replies (10) Good night (614) Bad night (4895)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.

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  (317): Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success. http://tfl.nu/9gb8
  Replies (9) Good night (3789) Bad night (1066)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?

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  (512): Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits? http://tfl.nu/6yhs
  Replies (84) Good night (1430) Bad night (10901)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.

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  (336): I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done. http://tfl.nu/4ilz
  Replies (12) Good night (957) Bad night (3008)
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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.

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  (662): Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference. http://tfl.nu/teq1
  Replies (7) Good night (2317) Bad night (603)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.

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  (256): Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again. http://tfl.nu/e17o
  Replies (4) Good night (2121) Bad night (680)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.

  (1-216): View more from Ohio

  Go her

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  (216): He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman. (1-216): Go her http://tfl.nu/p01p
  Replies (6) Good night (1976) Bad night (549)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building

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  (314): My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building http://tfl.nu/5uwh
  Replies (4) Good night (1038) Bad night (457)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.

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  (231): My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping. http://tfl.nu/e8qk
  Replies (7) Good night (1709) Bad night (478)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober

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  (757): also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober http://tfl.nu/ijy4
  Replies (1) Good night (782) Bad night (464)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real

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  (785): My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real http://tfl.nu/x4mj
  Replies (3) Good night (2147) Bad night (334)

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