the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
