omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
