I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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