My friends, they love my intelligence
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
How external is "for external use only"?
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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