Is it normal to miss your booty call?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
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