i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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