i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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