I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
