fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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