It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
