oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
soo... how was my night?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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