Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Randomize
