So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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