oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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