dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
