We're like a lot better than the average bears
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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