Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
