As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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