i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.