he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
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the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
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I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!