everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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