You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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