the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize