I would go down on you faster than GM stock
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
