we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Randomize
