i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
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