Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
