He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
