The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
this just has baby written all over it
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
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