I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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