dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
