the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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