sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
