I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Randomize
