It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize