I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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