uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
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Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
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I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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